How to Cook for Kids if you live on Planet Observer

I had a kid free Sunday evening. I wanted a big newspaper to read. The Observer called - it was the front page flash promising a 10 page magazine feature on How to Cook for Kids that did it for me.

I can't believe I got so angry about it I had to write to the editor (see below).

What utter, utter tosh! Seared scallops and Salmon saltimbocca I ask you!

To read this nonsense (and actually the Observer has done us parents a big favour by publishing this article - at least we won't waste our hard-earned cash on the pretentious book the so-called recipes come from) see http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/aug/09/gastrokid-cooking-kids.

Here's what I had to say to the editor:


Dear Editor,

What utter tosh! As the mum of two young boys and the wife of a chef we have a keen interest in food in our family so I picked up yesterday's Observer looking forward to reading your 10 page magazine special on How to Cook for Kids as flagged up on your front page.
Never in my life have I read such pretentious nonsense! Have our national newspapers totally lost touch with reality?
Salmon Saltimbocca? Seared Scallops? Radish, Watercress and Feta salad? Hello?
Now let's imagine we all had the money to buy ingredients like scallops to feed our kids wth in the first place. Perhaps the residents of Chelsea and Kensington pop into Waitrose or wherever for a few scallops for their little darlings of a weekend but, for the majority of parents, such luxuries would rarely make it onto the menu. Indeed, your own newspaper also carried an article on the rise of supermarket own label goods and for most of us, it's about feeding our families as well as we can on a tight budget these days.
Now, take a class of average 10 year olds and suggest they sit down to sardines and mustard for their supper. I predict a riot!
Not only were these recipes so incredibly wide of the mark as far as most kids are concerned, they weren't even that good.
And it was a case of hunt the missing ingredients in the photography. I might keep the magazine and turn iit into a game for my kids!
Can anyone tell me where the chorizo and chick peas were supposed to be hiding in the Prawn and Chorizo Non-Paella, for examle? And I'll gladly stand supper for anyone who can spot the watercress in the Radish, Watercress and Feta Salad - looked to me like a few radishes sliced up on a bit of stale old ciabatta!
I have a 10 year old son who happily tucked into fois gras and demanded to try horse meat while on holiday in France last year.
He loves a home-made curry, can demolish spag bol in seconds and is in and out of the fruit bowl all day. He also adores burger and chips and occasionally (gasp!) asks for a Pot Noodle when he's going fishing with his dad.
He enjoys a certain amount of salad and veg and can make a mean stiry fry all by himself. But really?
How Hugh (and his practically fruitarian daughter!) and Matthew managed to convince (con?) not only a publisher but also a national newspaper, into publishing such pretentions nonsense in the name of our kids is beyond me! If any parent out there buys this book with the belief that it offers good advice about feeding a family they will be wasting their hard earned cash. Perhaps, by publishing these 'recipes' in avdance, the Observer has in fact done us all a favour.
I dare you to try some of these dishes out on a group of hand picked kids and see what they really think Roasted Chickpea Bruschetta (where was the bread?) or Grilled Courgette. It makes Annabloodybel Karmel look almost realistic.
We're off on our 'staycation' to Wales next week. The chef has plans to smoke mackeral caught by him and the kids. Lovely! The new Weber barbecue will be getting a battering on a daily basis. We've heard you can pick wild strawberries on our campsite.
But we'll also be heading to Lidl in advance to stock up on fruit, ham, crisps, croissants, pasta, beans, cheese, biscuits and all those other things that normal kids like to fuel up on when running around a campsite getting dirty, tired and hungry all day. I think I might even throw a few Pot Noodles in my trolley just for the hell of it!
Yours faithfully,

Michele Hart
0161 282 0545
07796 276672

PS - I don't have a book to sell, I don't have a business to push but I promise you that my husband and I could come up with a better How to Feed your Kids feature than this. Please start thinking about real people and families for a change. We consider ourselves foodies. We try to encourage our kids to eat healthily and expand their palates (something of a challenge with our youngest who is on the autistic spectrum). We cook with our kids and tell them where their food comes from. We grow our own veg. And there's nothing we like more than sitting down to a good home cooked meal with the extended family. We also go to McDonalds occasionally, rely on fish fingers and baked beans or a chippie tea on a Friday when the boys have to be at cricket by 6.30pm and we even let our boys run out to the ice cream van and have a volcano (like a 99 but covered in hideous blue sherbert!) every now and again!